“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” Matthew 19:5
One would interpret the scripture above as encouraging a man to leaving HIS lifestyle. However, on many occasions when a couple jumps the broom, the wife is expected to leave her church and join her husband at his place of worship. If you’re a couple who just so happened to be members of the same church, then count your blessings because this topic can cause excessive strain on a marriage. Here’s how my husband and I are currently maneuvering our way through this touchy matter.
Submission Isn’t Enough
The Bible says for wives to submit to their husbands because the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church (Ephesians 5:22-23). What does this mean? If your husband wants you to join his church, you have to. Technically, husbands can call all the shots, and wives have to submit. However, submission isn’t enough. Love is also a requirement. After the Bible informs wives to submit to their husbands, it says for husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church.
Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her, to sanctify her by cleansing her with the washing of the water by the word, so that he may present the church to himself as glorious—not having a stain or wrinkle, or any such blemish, but holy and blameless. Ephesians 5:25-27
Just as wives should submit to their husbands, husbands have a responsibility of ensuring his wife is in an spiritual environment where she can flourish.
No Church is Perfect #FruitCheck
There may be conflict when it comes to choosing a church home because each individual may have their own ideologies of what Sunday morning should look like. It’s important to remember that no church is perfect. Go back to the basics. Is the unadulterated Word of God being taught? Are you being discipled? Are you being strengthened and encouraged to disciple someone else? A best-selling author/pastor and a Grammy award winning choir is cool, but they are not necessities for choosing a church home. Is there evidence of fruit? (Galatians 5:22-23)
Should You Join Your Husband’s Church?
Yes. If that is his desire, follow him as he follows God. There are many things that can tear a marriage apart. Choosing a place to worship God should never be one of them. If this continues to be an issue in your marriage, seek unbiased counseling and counsel from the Lord.
“And if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand.” Mark 3:25