You may be seriously head over heels for her, but she’s not fully committing to you. What are the signs she’s using you emotionally?
Are you someone who will be open and vulnerable and take a risk on your love? First, you need to figure out if the girl you’re with shows the signs she’s using you emotionally.
First of all, love isn’t easy. When we do find it, it gets even harder. Now, this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t fall in love—you should! It’s one of the best feelings you’ll experience. But you want to make sure that you’re giving your heart to someone who actually wants to cherish it. I know, I sound like I’m 90 years old, but I’m speaking the truth here!
This isn’t to say all women are going to string you along, but there are many that will. Is this because they’re evil? No. This is simply because they’re scared of getting hurt. [Read: Is she an attention whore who’s using you?]
The 11 must-know signs she’s using you emotionally
Women aren’t stupid. We see how many men have side chicks and don’t respect the point of being in a relationship. So, to deal with this, we keep our options open even when we might really like you. Why is this? It’s all done so that we save ourselves from getting hurt. I’m not saying she’s a good or bad person because of this, I’m telling you what it is.
Stringing anyone along is a selfish thing to do while you’re keeping your options open. This shows huge trust issues, ones that will take time to overcome. If someone is stringing you along, you respect yourself, so find someone new. Cause we all know, it’s not cool.
#1 You feel something slightly off. You have intuition, don’t kid yourself. You know when something doesn’t feel completely right and if that’s the case then there’s definitely something wrong in the relationship. Now, this doesn’t mean that she’s emotionally using you, it could be a sense of something else, but the point is, you feel it inside of you.
#2 She doesn’t commit to any long-term plans. Long-term could mean a couple months from now or years from now, but the point is, she’s not committing to anything. Maybe you have a wedding coming up in a month and asked her to be your date. But instead of her saying yes, she gives you a “maybe” and some flaky excuse that goes with it. This is a sign that she’s not sure if she’s going to be with you that far ahead.
#3 She likes the good things in life. Don’t we all? I’m not calling her a gold digger because that wouldn’t be fair. But when you’re taking her out, she wants to go to the best places, have you buy her the nicest things, and treat her extremely well. However, she’s not looking for anything emotional with you. In fact, you feel more like a credit card than a boyfriend.
#4 You conversations are skin deep. You don’t really get into an intense conversation, nothing that makes you feel emotionally connected to her. You’ll talk about your day, work, friends, but nothing that will make her open to you emotionally. She doesn’t talk about her childhood, anything personal going on in her life now, or how she feels about you.
#5 She’s slow to reply to you. Whether it’s via text message or phone call, she’s not quick to get back to you. Of course, some people are too busy at work to reply, but you always have a minute to quickly reply to someone you care about. Especially in today’s world where we’re all glued to our phones. But if she takes hours to reply, she doesn’t really care.
#6 She doesn’t remember the little details. We all know how important the small things are when it comes to relationships. These little details that we know about the other person make all the difference. But she doesn’t remember the small things. Maybe you had an important meeting today, but she never asked you how it went because she didn’t remember.
#7 You don’t feel safe. She’s not going to kill you in the middle of the night, that’s not what I’m talking about. Around her, you don’t feel secure with yourself or the relationship. You feel that she’ll leave when she has a better opportunity come her way. Since you’re reading this, you know quite well what this feeling is like.
#8 She mentions her ex frequently. Of course, we all mention our exes from time to time, especially if we spent a lot of time with them in the past. These are people we cannot simply avoid, they’re in our memories. But, if she’s going on and on about her ex, well, she’s clearly not over him. This is a huge sign that shows you, you’re not the one.
#9 There’s no affection. Unless you’re in the bedroom. When you have sex, she displays signs of affection, however, when you’re out in public or talking to each other one-on-one, she’s cold. There’s no physical contact or sweet words exchanged between you. If anything, she’s making sure she doesn’t cross over the line.
#10 You’ve been warned. Well, if you’ve been warned then come on, man. If people around you are telling you she’s no good and that she’s done this before, you fell into this on your own. She’s probably beautiful and the sex is good, so why would you stop something that’s going well for you? This is why! You really need to focus on these signs she’s using you emotionally!
#11 She’s not there when you need her. Maybe you had a rough day at work or a fight with a friend. These are the times when you turn to your partner to console and support you. But alas, she’s nowhere to be found. And that’s because she actually doesn’t care about any of it. Call her when you’re feeling better so you don’t rain on her parade.
So, I’ve shown you the signs she’s using you emotionally. Do you notice some of these signs with your girl? If so, then you need to figure out the next step.