No matter how well you think you know a guy, there’s always a chance he’s not being honest about his intentions — or his relationship status. It’s one thing being blindsided by your partner’s infidelity, and a whole other story if you’re a willing side chick. Here’s why being the other woman is the worst decision you can make:
1. You’re the girl that other girls hate. Being a woman means that you’re part of a sisterhood, and there are some things we should never put each other through. Yes, you’re single. Yes, the guy is at fault, too. But karma’s a bitch, and you wouldn’t want another girl sneaking around with your boyfriend, would you?
2. If all you’re getting out of the deal is 5ex, you have better options. Seriously, this the golden age of easy hook-ups. There are so many more stress-free options to finding someone to screw your brains out or hold you for the night, if that’s what you’re into.
3. You’re enabling bad behavior. Guys do this only because they can get away with it. As women, we need to keep our expectations high and make clear that this “fad” is not acceptable.
4. It’s highly unlikely that you’re ever going to be promoted to girlfriend. Sure, the fact that his relationship is in such poor shape that he’s cheating means that it probably won’t last very long. But even if he does break up with his girlfriend, don’t count on him running into your arms when he does. More likely than not, he’ll have had his fill of drama from the breakup and will want to start fresh with somebody totally new.
5. There are other, less dramatic ways to get a self-esteem boost. Seriously, if you’re looking for someone to tell you how hot you are, get an Instagram account or throw on your sexiest outfit and hit the club. Wouldn’t you rather stop the drama?
6. No matter how careful you are, the two of you going to get caught. No self-respecting girlfriend hasn’t already figured out her boyfriend’s iPhone password. There’s going to come a day when her curiosity gets the better of her. If you think that it’s only him that will feel the wrath, you’re wrong. You can bet she’ll come at you with full force.
7. Reputation still matters. The Internet has made the world a much smaller place, and your reputation will follow you around. When you’re the “side chick,” you risk creating enemies, and that’s never going to have a positive impact on your reputation.
8. Trust is a crucial prerequisite to having sex. No matter how comfortable you are with the idea of casual relationships, you still need to trust the person you’re sleeping with. How can you trust someone when your relationship is built on secrecy and sneaking around?
9. It will slowly drive you insane. You’ll try as hard as you can not to think about his “main” girlfriend, but no matter what you do, you won’t be able to get her out of your mind. You might even find yourself in one of those Facebook-stalking black holes where you spend hours trying to figure out everything about her and trying to suppress feelings of jealousy. Not the most emotionally healthy way to spend a weekend.
10. You deserve to be somebody’s number one. Even more important than all of the other reasons combined is the fact that you shouldn’t have to be someone’s second choice. Let yourself come first!